An OKCupid for finding people who like you, that you like back.
A place where sex is secondary, some possible distant outcome. A place where everyone has zero interest in finding a significant other, but total commitment in finding significant people.
I’m thinking swipe right to mean “I’d like to hang out with you”.
Facebook could be it, but that “friend request” is too darn fake. We’re not friends. We like what we present to each other as what we think is desirable and cool about us. Friendships build on shared experiences. That’s it. If you have a zillion people in your address lists (wherever these lists live is of no importance) but you do zero things together, you have a lot of acquaintances. Friends take time away from you and you take time away from them, it’s a win win.
Facebook with their groups maybe? But it’s weird, you’re like … in a common space. It’s like those open floor plans. Such noise, so “open”.
Bars are nice. You get one on one by design. There is a bartender if no one likes you …
I’ve always thought you should consider yourself lucky, if you like those who like you. But people seem to find this thing very easy, Maybe it’s just me … Today the AppStore showcase ten dating apps, all huge hits. I look around and I see folk with so many “friend” stories. Then the shallowness reveals itself.
I think making friends is a lot harder than finding a date.
Yes life time commitment is harder than friendship, but who’s into that anymore?
Sometimes I feel as if globally friendship is going away, fading out. I see huge swaths of people with similar political views out in the streets, but no movement, no real piercing. I think this is because friendships make close knit belief systems, while common interest just exorcises frustration.
Those people on TV. God. They’re either in perfect friend groups or in completely shallow and distant life navigation mode. Not all, sometimes some producer gives some director the chance to show some writer’s actual idea on friendship, but it’s so rare.
Coworkers? They’re not your friends. Sure some are. But generally the nature of modern work put a hard strain on human relationships. Coworkers are somewhere between friends and acquaintances. They’re not as far off as an acquaintance because you spend the bulk of the week with them, yet the eroded trust, diverging goals and mixed signals make them not be friends. The amount of beers or mimosas shared means nothing towards friendship, and you know it.
Coworkers are neither alive nor dead. They’re like zombies and perhaps this is the reason you sometimes have such a good time with them because like zombies we all as coworkers appear to lack a brain in certain situations. Kidding, I think.
Why doesn’t the internet help us in making real friends?
I think people are like published content. The internet solved distribution but in the process it completely hampered discovery and surfacing of true quality. In a sea of sex crazed folk, like that first episode dude in the Netflix documentary on sex, in a sea of increasing peculiarity and trivial information rivers, who’s to see a drifting boat’s flag colors?