All of Romania roots for Bernie Sanders!

Around here, in this particular forsaken land in Easten Europe, there is an old joke:

The ultimate plan for Romania’s prosperity: declare war on the US and then surrender!

Now, Bernie Sanders has good reason to invade Romania. We’ve been waiting for this development for ages around here, we finally have something the americans want: our much faster internet! The plans for the quiet, bloodless surrender are already in place since 60 years ago!

The romanian people, who waited 45 years to be freed from the russian boot, are as happy as ever to welcome our cross atlantic brothers and sisters to feast on our metropolitan fiber optics.

As a not powerful member of NATO, and aparent political puppet of the american embassy in Bucharest, we’ll even stop our torrent downloads, so that our bandwidth is free for naughty america streaming and the real Netflix, not the watered down crap they gave us.

Our hopes and dreams are that the newly annexed Romania will be the 51st state, not some “territory” that has third world problems. Just imagine how better the jokes will be on SNL compared to the now dry Alaska and Canada ones!