The martian: don’t

The martian is an excuse of a movie. I went to see it and I was very disappointed. Here are my top 10 reasons:

  1. Ridley Scott has no vision (anymore), he does the same thing over and over in a self limiting way. Everything is below bar: actors do bad parts from leads to all supporting cast. What is that NASA director about? He directed the actors into flat paper characters .In 2015 you direct the joy of the planet by shots in tree public squares? Mr. Scott should watch some TV.
  2. Why was the scene where a dude clicks open a pen using a woman’s head necessary?
  3. A boring 3d movie. No sense of need for 3D. Mars looks like lego. Unimpressive effects. I removed my 3D glasses because there was no perspective of how big the mountains were compared to that darn rover. Embarassing cinematography. In space all we get is Space Oddisey again. On mars cardboard. And to think you’d see the most impressive heights out there.
  4. Matt Damon seriously needs to upgrade his acting skills. He is so detached from his condition. The jokes are not funny. He does not vary his acting troughout the entire movie.
  5. There is no tension. None of the characters make you care. Nobody dies in what looks like space acrobatics. Nobody even breaks a nail. The crew are uni-dimensional to the bone.
  6. It is simply a popcorn movie that should enthrill a generation into space exploration. Except that for any discerning audience it could have been Matt Damon in the desert growing potatoes and we’d get the same movie. No space thrill, no higher calling, nor a greater good. There is nothing awesome in his achievement other than just surviving in harsh conditions.
  7. Its base message of “do the math, solve and problem, if you solve all the problems you get to go home” is more mass education than your stomach will take. Vomitive stuff at the end.
  8. Whoever compared this with Gravity clearly didn’t think too much. This movie is not about space. It is not about Mars. It is not about science. It is about ‘muricans saving ‘muricans. Its a Hallmark story. Sorry, but the international community would do much more in reality than what this popcorn B movie suggests. Cuaron made everything out of that simple soap opera script. Scott had a great book and it turned it into a bad super hero movie. Space ballet.
  9. It didn’t look harsh. Jesus Ridley, read all dressed up for mars and nowhere to go, then direct this movie again.
  10. Sean Bean is fired. Gee, didn’t see that coming.