Look! Unicorns and rainbows! Fuck off.

I am sorry Dolly Parton, but I hate these shitty life affirming, positive and empowering bullshit phrases:

I hate them because they make things far worse than better.

The problem with the rainbow is that it is an illusion, a special effect. You cannot rip the rainbow from the sky and put it in a vase, you cannot snatch a rainbow and wear it around your neck at the diversity parade, what am I saying here, you can do just about nothing with it other than staring in awe at it.

Generally speaking, this whole staring in awe thing will not give one visceral satisfactions. And the thing is non visceral satisfaction is not memorable. On the other hand, the rain … The rain is cold, it is wet, it is plenty, it has side effects: makes the day darker, makes mud, increases humidity, creates the sudden need for accessories — covers, umbrellas — and the list can go on. You viscerally feel the rain and whatever you do you cannot ignore it. Even if you’re inside, you still hear it. The simple fact that we uncontrollably feel good when the sun is out after a rain says a lot about how we instinctively appreciate the light and how we instinctively don’t appreciate bad weather.

In life we get plenty of situations similar to the damn rainbow. People run bumping into each other chasing success, recognition or love, briefly running around trying to catch illusory images that cannot be perceived viscerally but only intellectually. This is the essence of that chronic unhappiness lived while hoarding hundred thousands, millions of money in the bank. From this chasing of rainbows you get those existential panic attacks lived next to your perfect soulmate with whom you’re raising two healthy children, in a perfect house with fresh bio vegetables for breakfast. Some people’s sadness and anger really makes no sense, but it is completely explainable.

For that soulmate and those perfect children, for the millions of money into a bank account, or many other similar things, many rains were borne with dignity. And some of those rains got you in your undies, others brought sleet along, many more had a dry and coarse wind coming, which of course was blowing in the opposite direction of your walking, while other rains made swamps hiding holes which broke your car. One of these rains was warm, and you ran barefoot though the water on the pavement. One, once, maybe. And after you’ve withstood so many rains, what did you get? A rainbow? With whom you do what? You stare at it, you admire the color depth, the length of the rays, you get annoyed because you can’t see it right because of some damn building or some industrial artifact blocking the view — and the you suddenly get a pain in the neck from looking up for so long. Done.

That’s about a good approximation of these types of happiness: “ideal family”, “ideal house”, “success”, “fame”, “prince charming” and so on. After going through a long string of physical experiences which get only worse and more complex, all you get is another experience but which is happening only in your head, in your drunk on waiting mind. Why do you think people crave social approval so much? To be able to finally physically experience their success: to have your friends tell you that your house is nice, to wonder affectionately about the harmony in your life and so forth. Because alone you can only feel the memories of the experience you kept on having — up until that point when the rainbow finally popped up.

I don’t know of any advice. The whole thing is not very optimistic, maybe, I don’t know, do the unthinkable and carefully watch The Wolf of Wall-Street by Scorsese or even read Jordan Belfort’s book and it might change for the better your opinion on rainbows after the rain.

love me I dare you

12 things to remember daily

Just an exercise in list making:

1. You are a special and unique person

Not a special and unique human. No. There is probably at least one other like you and your genes are pretty common. So are your features, nothing here makes you special or unique.

But you are special as a person. Your personality, that which makes you a person, has been devised by thousands of experiences thrown at you by life. The order and type of these experiences are unique, therefore you are unique.

Learn from this to not identify with others and understand that no one can be in your shoes. You are doing your best and in the end the race is only with yourself, says Mary Schmich.

2. You will never, ever know what happens when you die

If that is ever known life will be a prison, an exercise of sanctity or lust to either score afterlife points or use the little time you’ve got before eternal darkness takes over. But in my opinion we, the ones here, will never know whats next simply because we’ll have no one to ask. No one comes back to haunt us.

This means the future will always be uncertain. Therefore we require some kind of balance, or respect for life where actions help us become beings we like so that we can do the next thing:

3. Indulge in yourself, you are the greatest experience of them all

I see zombies all over, people who simply don’t inhabit their bodies anymore. What is life worth if all you do is follow and constantly internalize the input from outside of you. You have your way, find it and lead, be the leader in your own life.

4. Be good at what you do

This is the best money advice that you’ll ever get.

5. Enjoy your world

Truth is travel is not easy. Actually it is becoming the most expensive thing. A while ago material possessions were so cherished that one would dedicate their life just for a piece of that. Now immaterial possessions are just as cherished: experiences, stories, portfolio, careers, coolness, spirituality, abstinence and so on. People will always apply the same model in everything that they do but only change the names of the ingredients.

So do your best and enjoy your world even if you never leave the city you were born into. Have no stress that multicultural traveling will open your mind and life in some forgotten village will close it. It is simply not true. Indeed you will have far less experience in handling novelty, but you can be an open minded person without actually having to cover half the planet for it.

6. Life is not a school and learning implies effort

There is no such thing as the school of life. It is only some thing people with weak minds invented to justify for the trickery and thieving of other well intended and well educated folks. Also shit that comes along is not meant to teach you anything. Forget as best as you can this superficial spirituality.

Whatever you want to learn will require work. A lot of work. Learning invades your entire mind and will occupy your entire time.

7. Know that the truth is relative

This is one of the most relaxing attitudes you can have. Understand this and you will feel less anxious to prove yourself, care less about what others think, feel less misunderstood and overall have a much better relationship with yourself.

8. What you do affects the world

Especially ignorance. Even more so not doing anything. Lack of care. You get the point.

9. There are special people, you should find them

It is not the famous people nor the rich. It might be, but most often there will be the people you just happen to meet because they must somehow change your life. They don’t event know it, you somehow do but not sure why.

10. Practice introspection

Man know thyself; then thou shalt know the Universe and God. Need I say more? Ah, yes. In case you are not interested in knowing the Universe and God, i mean they could be pretty boring and annoying (one is mostly empty and the other knows everything), introspection still is very important.

You cannot be happy without knowing yourself. The more you know what you are, the more you feel who you are the more you will understand what makes you happy. Happiness is peculiar and particularly individual that is why pursuit is needed and one way to go is inside.

11. Be the master of your freedom

You literally can do anything. You literally can not achieve anything.

For example say you are 50 y.o. and suddenly decide to become an opera singer after a lifetime of accountant work. You can do it. Literally. Join a canto course, sing a few hours a day, every day. Join another canto course, read up on this, learn music. If you have the physical properties in 10 years you will sing opera amazingly.

But as achievement is concerned, most probably you will not be lead singer at any state opera anywhere. Nor will you be featured in about any place. Even if you would get this it should be owned to you being an oddity. Achievement is ephemeral.

If you understand this and stop chasing the fata morgana of achievement you will master your freedom.

12. Principles are rock, ideas are scissors and reality is paper.

A principle can ruin an idea as the idea can be simply crushed by the moral, aesthetic, logic or religious weight of the principle.

Reality is paper. It can envelope the principle and simply make it disappear.

Ideas are scissors. That’s what we do with our creativity, we simply cut out reality in bits we can handle, in shapes we like. Ideas beat reality. It doesn’t matter that we love cars or that driving is a hobby, a passion.

If there’s a will, there’s a way


God, I’m so tired of being told this 

Of course, i know, we’re all haunted since childhood by this puny little saying which became a proverb, then an axiom of personal development and today a shiny little glimmer of common folk’s simple wisdom – and its annoying.

So, can we revisit in a couple of paragraphs this linguistic obsession of low quality personal development? Yes we can! As Morgan Freeman put it “that’s the miracle of it!” ☺

If there’s a will, there’s a way, but, will you?

Dear wise human, do not start with the will because you’ll put the cart before the horse. First, breathe deep, take a look around and try to see clearly if you really want what you will. That is tricky, indeed, because sometimes will takes the form of empty lust, or other times thy will is, in fact, some life blocking principle that you’re so stuck on. Paying attention to such differences does indeed require some training and truly there may be times when there’s a way, but you really don’t want what you will.

If there’s a will, there’s a way, especially if you will your way.

This is a good idea to filter advice trough. Advice is a form of nostalgia ☺ and so be careful wether you identify with whomever gave you the advice, otherwise the experience of applying the advice will be in you way, rather than helping along the way. Nevertheless, even more importantly, do you know your way? Have you been self focused enough to be able to define it: your way? Because knowing your way is surely a key that fits in the lock of some door that opens to success. All great people, like those who “make it”, you know quality folk, dependable persons, the achievers, the punctual and the fair, all these fabulous ones, differentiate from the rest trough the simple fact of knowing their way and setting their will accordingly: they know what to work on, they know how long they’ll take, the know what are able to offer and only promise that, metaphorically they know how they want to travel too, not only the destination.

Finally, it is true! Sometimes, if there’s a will, there’s a way! So, yeah, if you have the will and the way too, well, than: just get on with it already! — and stop wasting time reading inspirational stuff on the internets.